3 July 2026
Question
My teenage daughter came home from school shocked. Her maths teacher told the class that if she had to choose between saving her goldfish or her mother, she would save her goldfish. The students asked, “Is your mother that awful?” "Not at all," she replied. "We're just not very close, and I've had my goldfish for years. I'm very attached to it." So the students asked, what if you could only save us or your goldfish, which would you choose? And she said, without blinking an eye, my goldfish. What is wrong here?
That is a fantastic teacher. She has taught in one lesson what others take years to give over. She has taught by example what happens when people lose a moral compass.
Her moral judgment is based on personal preference. She loves her cat. She loves her goldfish. She isn't close with her mother. The priorities are clear. I save who I love the most. My pets.
This worldview turns morality into a popularity contest. Whoever I love most wins. Right and wrong are replaced by likes and dislikes. What’s right for me may not be what’s right for you, as we all have different preferences. Maybe you love your mother more than you love your goldfish. That’s your business. And if I happen to prefer my mother over my goldfish, well, that’s up to me.
This is a dangerous path. Once morality is based on personal preference, anything can be justified. Your daughter’s class learnt that when imagining their teacher leaving them to die while she saves her goldfish.
We don’t think that way. Right and wrong are not subject to my tastes and fancies. Even if I love my goldfish, a human life is infinitely more valuable. A stranger I've never met takes precedence over my beloved pet. The value of a life is not measured by how I feel about it.
Every human being is created in G-d’s image and has infinite worth. This is not to devalue animals. We must treat them humanely. The Torah commands us to feed our animals before we feed ourselves, and to avoid causing needless harm to any living being. But when it comes to saving lives, humans come first.
Tell your daughter she was right to be shocked. Her instincts were spot on. That teacher was wrong. She should stick to teaching maths, because her morality doesn't add up.
