Is Your Mess a Good Thing?

Answer

There was once a very gracious host, who always wanted his guests to feel totally comfortable. He used to spill wine at the beginning of every meal, so the guests wouldn’t feel embarrassed when the inevitable accident happened and they dirty the tablecloth. It’s like he was saying, “This beautiful Shabbos table is going to get messy. Might as well get it out of the way now and avoid any awkwardness later. I’ll go first.”

This would be reason enough to spill the Kiddush wine. But there are deeper reasons for overfilling the cup at the Shabbos table.

All blessings for the coming week come down to the world on Shabbos. As we pour the wine into our Kiddush cup, we are inviting those blessings into our lives, and opening our hands to receive them.

We all need blessings. Whether we seek better health, to find love, or to make a living, we require divine assistance to fulfil whatever we lack.

But often we limit our blessings by dictating to G-d where He should send them. We ask, “May this job interview be successful”, “Please make this date the right one”, “G-d, I really need this medical procedure to work”, “Please make this the winning ticket.”

On the one hand, we do need to be specific in our prayers. At the same time, we must have faith that G-d can find many ways to deliver our blessings, not necessarily the way we expected. A failed date may be the best thing for us, and a missed opportunity could be the doorway to a better one. We ask for what we believe we need, but we remain open to whatever path G-d deems the best for us.

That’s why we allow our cup to overflow. We don’t know where the real blessings will fall. We may think that the blessings should go directly into our cup. But maybe they need to go all over the table and a bit on the floor. Your salvation can come from a direction you never would have guessed. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. And don’t pour all your wine into one cup.